Just about every warning sign that my school is going to fold is there. Low and dropping enrollment, everyone who applies gets in, low prestige, small endowment that is continually depleting, and even within our combined Sociology/Anthropology/Criminal Justice/Political Science department our student enrollment is dropping like flies. Honestly, CJ seems to keep us afloat or we would barely have double digit majors in each discipline..
So, honestly, it seems like the writing is on the wall that this place is going to fold faster than Superman on laundry day. Either I get out and go on the market now or in 2 years I'm going to have to anyway.
The issue I have here is, how do I even do this as an AP? Working against me, I went to a MRM at best (probably a top LRM if I'm being truly honest), but I do have a top four journal as a first author under my belt. I'm also an advanced AP at this point so it might look fishy that I'm leaving.. like I know I'm not going to get tenure at my weak SLAC, you know? Plus I would have to ask for at least one letter in house, which means I could cause a lot of drama. I'm having a meltdown just thinking about all of this.
And honestly, I feel like all of this has to do with the University President and Provost who took over a few years ago. You see, my university is located in rural South Carolina, almost 100% local, and the student body is incredibly homogeneous: they all have SAT scores around 560, all f*ck pigs, all love muddin' and listening to Johnny Rebel, all practice incest and meth cooking, and all suffer from the gum disease known as gingivitis.
The new President and Provost are from Connecticut and have invested in Listerine to combat the gum disease known as gingivitis as part of tuition, have banned pigs from campus, and have made having above a 4th grade reading level an admission requirement. This has caused an outrage among the student body and would be students in the community, and I feel is directly responsible for the problems my SLAC is facing. I spoke to one student about it who told me "If ah caint f*ck Oinkie at skeeewl, thin ahm ginna tranzfurr tew Ole Miss.. hyuck hyuck hyuck hyuck!" So, there is a real pushback from the students.
But back on topic, how do I get off of this sinking ship without looking terribly desperate?